My Sister is a Whore

It is never a good sign when you're calling the person you look up to and whom you hold in the highest regard, a whore. Luckily, even though she's a Catholic school girl, the kind of whore I'm referring to has nothing to do with getting drunk and telling a guy you'd like to see his condo at 4 AM. (This is a relief since she's married to my brother and has a three year old). The kind I'm referring to is strictly limited to the whorish tendencies of Facebook. This is not to be confused with the Facebook stalker category, which I have admittedly fallen in to from time to time.

A few years back, I was at my brother and sister-in-law's house, surfing the Internet and likely Facebook stalking, when Kristyn glanced over my shoulder and said with the underlying tone that I might be a pedafile, "You have a Facebook page?" I replied yes and quickly closed the window, knowing that Facebook was more of a college thing and she probably thought of it as a way to meet creeps online. In actuality, it was an avenue to look at your high school friends at their respective colleges, taking beer bongs and smoking pot bongs.

In the past year or so, Facebook has evolved from a community of college kids to a place where I've become friends with everyone from my former campers to my third grade teacher. And then came Kristyn...the Anti-Christ. A couple of weeks ago I got a Facebook alert that Kristyn Perlman Kaplan had requested me as a friend. Initially, I went through my brain filofax to make sure I didn't know anyone else by that name. When it finally set in, I accepted her and waited for the madness to begin.

Her next move was an album filled with pictures primarily of Alexis, my niece. (Side Bar---When my brother joined Facebook I deleted all pictures I had up of Alexis for fear that he'd yell at me for exposing her online.) Still confused, I rolled with it.

Last night as we discussed our weekend plans on the phone, Kristyn admitted that she was stressed out. Assuming it was something involving work, family or a new purchase from Intermix, I asked her why. She sighed and said she was annoyed because she couldn't figure out how she knew her latest Facebook request and it had taken her all day to figure it out. I laughed, especially when her next thought was to ask me if I had any good pictures she could post on her profile.

I will continue to marinate this new idea of the entire world being on Facebook. If my grandma signs up, I might have to deactivate.